Ba Dum Dum Tss
Bards can be heroic, blowing a trumpet or warhorn when the party rides forth, like Boromir sounding the Horn of Gondor and marshalling the Fellowship to battle. Bards can also move people to tears through careful playing of the lute, violin, or even a simple wooden flute, perhaps even bewitching the mind through the melody.
Or they can just bang out a simple rhythm on a drum. Pounding out a beat like the drummer on a slave barge setting the pace of the oars. Or maybe a marching band ratatat tat, ratatat tat. Yeah, I feel super inspired and ready to charge into battle…
Still better than a one-man band.
You know…Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker has a thing where, while you’re in battle with opponents, you’ll hear triumphant little ‘dun duns’ whenever you land a hit on an enemy. And a little twoi-oing when you get hit.
What if you did that as a bard in D&D? Play sound effects over hits and dramatic turns in battle, to make the hits by your side sound more debilitating, and any hits by the enemy sound cartoonish.
Ever watched X Country’s Funniest Home Videos before? Think about it, all of those accidents would sound much more painful if they came with cracks and squelches rather than honks and ding-dongs.